LinkedIn® makes it wonderfully easy to collect connections. It is much less efficient at turning those connections into people we genuinely know, trust and might one day work with.
That part still belongs to us.
A connection request can open a door, but it does not create a relationship. Even a promising first conversation is only a beginning. The strategic value appears later, as two people discover that there is a worthwhile reason to keep talking, sharing information, making introductions or collaborating.
This was the focus of a recent Disruptive Business Leadership discussion. The panellists approached the question from different directions, but their experiences pointed to the same conclusion: strong professional relationships are built progressively. They rely less on a prescribed networking sequence than on attention, relevance and the quality of what happens next.
Strategic does not mean transactional
The word strategic can sound calculated, as though every new contact needs to be assessed for commercial value. That is not what makes a relationship strategic.
A strategic professional relationship is one in which both people recognise continuing value. That value may involve knowledge, perspective, introductions, encouragement, access, referrals or opportunities. It does not need to be financial, immediate or evenly divided at every stage.
In fact, deciding too quickly what someone might be “worth” can close down the possibilities. The woman you follow because she writes intelligently about an audience you share might later become a collaborator, referral partner, podcast guest or simply a valuable professional friend. The first conversation does not need to determine the final destination.
The question at the beginning is not, “How can this person benefit me?” It is, “Is there enough genuine relevance here to continue the conversation?”
Start with the strongest genuine signal
Loose connections begin in all kinds of ordinary ways. Someone comments thoughtfully on a post. You meet briefly at an event. A mutual contact makes an introduction. A person follows you, answers a poll, views your profile or shares something that catches your attention.
Any one of those actions can provide context for the next step. The mistake is to ignore the context and push every person through the same networking routine.
A comment deserves a response related to the comment. A shared event creates an opportunity to continue something that was discussed there. A profile view might justify looking at the person’s profile, but not necessarily an immediate sales message. The action needs to be proportionate to the strength of the signal and the relationship that exists so far.
This context-driven approach also makes networking feel less manufactured. You do not need to invent a reason to contact someone when a perfectly good reason is already sitting in front of you.
Connect before you need something
Felipe Cofiño described the value of connecting with people before he needs to recruit them, invite them onto a programme or explore a collaboration. Small exchanges create a shared history. A later request then arrives as a continuation rather than a cold approach.
This does not require an elaborate nurturing campaign. A welcome message, a birthday acknowledgement, a thoughtful reply or an occasional check-in may be enough. What matters is that the contact is genuine and not merely the opening move in a hidden sales sequence.
The timing may also be longer than expected. Some relationships remain loose for months or years before circumstances create a reason for them to develop. That does not make the earlier contact pointless. It means the relationship was allowed to remain available without being forced.
Pay enough attention to act on what you hear
One of the clearest demonstrations of interest is doing something with the information another person has shared.
Martin Stark told the panel about a new contact who recommended a documentary. Martin watched it, returned with his thoughts and shared a related article. The contact then invited him to reach out if he ever wanted to talk.
The important action was not the article Martin sent. It was the attention that came before it. He had listened closely enough to recognise that the recommendation mattered, invested time in it and responded in a way that moved the conversation forward.
The same principle applies to a podcast episode, book, post, project or personal interest. People notice when we remember what matters to them. In a professional environment filled with automated messages and generic comments, attentive responses carry even more weight.
Offer something specific
“Let me know if I can help” is well intentioned, but it places the work back on the other person. A specific offer is easier to understand and more likely to be useful.
Roy Kowarski’s approach is to offer value before asking for it. That might mean providing a relevant database, sharing a resource, making an introduction or suggesting one concrete action. The gesture does not need to be large. It needs to show that the person has been heard and that the offer relates to what they are trying to achieve.
This is where professional generosity differs from indiscriminate giving. Sending the same checklist to every new connection is another form of automation. Relevant generosity begins with enough knowledge of the person to understand what may genuinely be useful.
Allow for pauses and uneven contributions
Mutual value does not mean that each person must contribute equally to every conversation. One may have more time, knowledge or access at a particular moment. Workloads change. Family matters intervene. People move in and out of LinkedIn.
Melanie Richards spoke about the power of a pause and the importance of allowing time for a response. A relationship can continue even when people do not message regularly, comment on every post or return every gesture immediately.
Keeping score makes the relationship feel like an obligation. A healthier measure is the pattern over time. Is there genuine interest? Does the other person respond when they can? Is the relationship broadly reciprocal, or is one person permanently doing all the work while the other extracts the benefit?
Patience is valuable, but it does not require ignoring a consistently one-sided relationship.
Know when not to pursue it
Not every connection is meant to become strategic. Some people will not respond. Others will reveal that their only interest is selling, moving you into an automated sequence or expanding their numbers. Some conversations will simply reach a natural end.
That is not a networking failure.
The purpose is not to convert every contact into a client, collaborator or referral partner. It is to recognise where real potential exists and invest attention accordingly.
A little persistence may be worthwhile when the context supports it, but pressure rarely builds trust. If the other person is not interested in continuing, forcing the exchange will not create a two-way relationship. It is usually better to leave the door open and move on.
One connection one relevant step
You do not need a new networking system to put this into practice. Begin with one person already in your wider network.
Look for someone with whom there is a genuine point of relevance but little recent contact. Review their profile and activity. Remind yourself how you met, what you have discussed and what appears to matter to them. Then take one proportionate step.
You might respond to something they have written, ask how a project developed, send an article connected to an earlier conversation or make a useful introduction. The aim is not to manufacture an outcome. It is to give a promising relationship a natural opportunity to continue.
A connection creates access. Attention, relevance, reliability and time determine what that access becomes.
Continue the conversation
🎥 Watch the full Disruptive Business Leadership conversation
📑 Read structured insights, practical takeaways and edited transcript.